Ties That bind
by Haitus80
Summary: How could she be so stupid? (This is a one shot that I started the other day, before I watched the last episode. Just a smutty one shot I wrote for fun. I wanted to try my hand at first person. Hope it wasn't a fail!


**I started this the other day, before I watched the last episode so this is totally AU I suppose. Some of you might think this is OOC and here is my argument. No one in this fandom can screw up the characters of The Walking Dead any more than the writers of this season have so I'm not too worried about all that anymore. **

**This is my first and last story to be written in first person. It was very difficult but kind of fun also. The first part is Carol's POV and the second part is Daryl's. Thanks for giving it a shot! **

**Ties That Bind**

A fist hit the metal file cabinet next to my head with such force that I actually flinched. I didn't find myself afraid of much anymore. What was left to fear once you've lost the thing you love the most, right? I watched him pace in front of me like an angry cat. His stance was predatory in every way, muscles bunching, eyes narrowed to furious slits, fists clenching. He looked like some sort of very pissed off, scruffy Greek God.

He stopped suddenly and took one long stride towards me, nearly pinning me to the wall. I had seen him like this before but that had been a lifetime ago and it hadn't been like this. This was much worse than that night at the farm. I never truly believed he would ever hurt me but right now he looked as though he could. I raised my chin and held his gaze defiantly.

"Why? Why would you do somethin' like that?" The words hit me in the face in the form of warm breath. I turned my head, refusing to meet that glare anymore.

"I didn't have a choice," I made sure to keep my voice level. I wasn't going to do this. I wasn't going to have this showdown. I had done what I had done. It was over and there wasn't anything to be done about it now. I had people to protect. I had_ him _to keep safe. After everything he had done for me I had no choice but to do this for him. I would never tell him that though.

"You told Rick. You looked him in the eye and told him that you did it like it was nothin' to you. Why? Carol, this ain't you."

"Isn't it?" I asked as my eyes met his again, a wave of anger causing me to take a step forward, forcing him back. "Who am I then? Explain to me who I'm suppose to be, since the woman standing here in front of you is obviously not me." I was so tired of this. I was so tired of trying to fill a role and be what other people wanted me to be. Half of them looked right past me as though I didn't exist at all. The other half made me out to be a martyr. It was to the point now where all I wanted to do was tell them all to go to hell. Who was he to tell me who I am?

"What you did was stupid," he spat, recovering from my own angry outburst quicker than I could.

"And what you did wasn't?" I countered as I stormed past him towards the door that would take me away from the cluttered office. Away from the man that had become my closest companion over the last few years. I wouldn't admit it but him looking at me with such disgust on his face was more painful than I imagined it would be.

He grabbed me by the upper arm right before I could escape the small room. His grip was painful as he spun me around to face him once more. I wasn't expecting it when he shoved me roughly against the door. "You ain't goin' no where. Not until you swear that you're gonna tell Rick the goddamn truth!" He was in my face again and I had to close my eyes and take slow even breaths to still the thundering of my heart. I realized then that I was afraid.

When I finally opened them he was still there, still glaring, breath coming fast and furious. I leaned my back further into the door, bracing myself. "No," I said quietly.

He let go of my arm and then shoved himself away from the door. I thought I would be able to get away when he turned his back on me and stormed off a few paces but as soon as I had the handle in my grip he yanked me away from the door, putting himself in front of it. I had nowhere to go and at this point I wasn't sure if anyone much cared where I was. "I'll tell'em myself," he growled as he leaned his own back against the door and crossed his arms over his chest.

I had to give him credit. It was sweet that he wanted to try but he had to know the truth. I couldn't help the sarcastic smile that settled on my lips. "You think they'll believe that?" I shook my head and watched him. He was losing steam. "They'll think that you are trying to protect me. I was the one Rick came too. He needed to find the person who did it."

"I did it!" He roared. I watched, heart clenching when he covered his eyes with the heels of his hands and then take in several slow and even breaths. "I did it," he repeated. "You just cleaned up the mess."

I took a step towards him and now it was him that was watching me warily. The angry look was gone as he regarded me. I crossed my arms. "Rick asked me if I burned those bodies. I told him the truth."

He shook his head, eyes rolling up to the ceiling as the back of his head hit the door with a dull thud. "He thinks you killed them and if he tells the others then..." his voice trailed off. I took another cautious step.

"Then Tyreese will want me dead and the others, they'll probably want me banished."

His eyes slid down and met mine as his teeth clacked together and a wild muscle twitched in his jaw. "And you ain't worried about that?"

I thought about his question for a long time while I kept my eyes locked on his. What could I say other than the truth? I tried to give him a reassuring smile. "No. I'm not worried about that."

"You don't get to do that," he growled as his eyes slid back down to mine. "You're gonna tell them the truth."

"I'm not going to do that, Daryl." I took another step.

"And what am I suppose to do when you end up gittin' yourself killed over somethin' I did?"

I was getting tired. All I wanted to do was get this over with. I was pretty sure the council was waiting for me and then all hell was going to break loose. The truth was, I didn't care anymore. I had lost enough and I had risen above it all. I had survived and flourished and I had proven to myself and the others that I was more than they had ever imagined I would be. I didn't have much else to offer but he did. He was one of the main reason's that people, my people, had survived as long as they had and I wasn't going to risk losing him over this. He had thought that he was saving the people he cared about. I be damned if he lost his place in this world because of that.

"I'm tired of it," I said slowly, looking down at his boots. "I'm ready to face whatever it is they have in store for me. You? They need you. What am I?" I wasn't looking for pity. I was trying to get him to see that out of the two of us I was the expendable one. He made a difference on a much greater scale than I did.

He gave me that disgusted look again but he spoke before I could look away. I hadn't avoided his eyes like this in a long time and I secretly hated myself for it because I knew that my time here could be running out. I should have been trying to memorize every detail about him. "What are you?" he spat, grabbing both my arms now and giving me a rough shake. "Are you serious?"

"Please just hear me out, okay? You feed these people. You lead them. You offer them hope on a huge scale. What am I?" I wanted him to understand. I didn't want him to hate me and I was starting to feel like he might by the time this was over.

"Everything," he deadpanned and then let his hands fall away from my arms. With one final look he turned and swung the door open so hard that it hit the wall and then he was gone.

I was stunned into immobility for a few long moments. What had he meant by that? Everything? That didn't make any sense. I couldn't wrap my mind around the word. I had trouble wrapping my mind around any sort of praise, even after all this time. Everything. I repeated the word in my mind so many times that it seemed to have lost its meaning. I left the room stiffly, knowing that the others were waiting. Knowing that he would be with the council now. Knowing that my fate was in the hands of the people I loved the most in this cruel and unforgiving world.

I had been willing to risk it all to save him from any sort of punishment. I understood the reasons behind his actions. I was willing to give up life as I knew it for him. As strange as it sounds now I understood my sacrifice and I had no fear.

Until now.

When I stepped into the room everyone looked towards the door. Daryl was in his usual spot with his chair turned around and his chin resting on the back. His eyes met mine and a million emotions passed in the depth of that gaze before he turned his head, refusing to look at me anymore. Hershel, Glenn, Maggie, Rick and Michonne were the only ones present. Tyreese was off somewhere and Sasha was still in isolation. This brought me little comfort.

I took my seat next to Daryl, just like I always did and Hershel cleared his throat before he began. I kept my head bowed and waited for my sentencing. I felt like every pair of eyes in the room were boring into me. A quick look around proved me wrong. Everyone was watching Hershel except for one person. Michonne.

Hershel's soft soothing voice filled the room then but I couldn't look away from the other woman's knowing gaze. Her dark eyes regarded me solemnly and a felt another pang of regret. This was a woman that had risen and conquered. She was a warrior and I respected her more than I did almost anyone else in the world. She was everything I could have been had I been stronger and to lose her respect nearly sickened me. "What's happened here is a tragedy," Hershel said sadly.

I jumped a little in surprise when I felt a rough hand slide down the top of my own and fingers linked through mine. Right there in front of everyone. I didn't look at him. Hell, I could scarcely breath. Michonne gave me a barely perceptible nod before she finally looked towards Hershel.

Hershel sighed and then went on. "We may not figure out who did this..." Daryl's fingers tightened around mine. "But we have to try to keep it from happening again."

My head shot up and I looked right at Rick. He hadn't told them. I didn't know why he hadn't and I wasn't sure why he kept my confession to himself but I was suddenly relieved. I had told myself that I was prepared to face whatever they threw at me. I told myself that I would be strong. I had basically been full of shit because once that relief flooded my system I thought I would ruin it all by weeping.

Rick's chair squeaked as he straightened up. "I don't think it's somethin' that will happen again. I think that whoever did this probably thought that they were containing this virus. They were tryin' to save the group. If that wasn't their intent then why isn't everyone in isolation dead right now? There's more to this than just some senseless murder."

"Is that what you plan to tell Tyreese?" Hershel asked. "Regardless of the reasoning behind this person's actions, Rick, two people are dead and they died at the hands of a person. A person that could be sleeping in a cell right next to one of ours at night."

Rick ran a hand over his face and met my eyes briefly. Daryl's fingers tightened more on mine. I was still surprised, and thankful, that he was offering me so much comfort considering how angry he had been when he had left me in that room. Not to mention that he wasn't the most cuddly guy in our group and right now he was practically holding my hand in front of everyone.

"I'll talk to Tyreese," Rick said after the silence became uncomfortable. "He'll have to understand that we may never find out who did this."

Daryl's low voice filled my ears then. "And if we do? What do we do then?"

I stiffened. I really didn't want to know what they had in store for the person that did this because Rick thought that I was the one. I thought I could feel his eyes on me but I was looking at Daryl. It was hard to read his expression sometimes and now was one of those times.

"Then we deal with it. Right now we need to go work on getting those fences secure. Unless anyone else has anything they would like to add." The finality in Rick's voice made me proud despite the words he had spoken. He was coming back and I was glad.

After a little more discussion the meeting was over and the room cleared out. Daryl was the last one to walk out and he didn't glance back when he pulled the door shut. I hadn't even moved from my chair. Once the room was empty I finally let myself relax. I had kept my composure for the most part and I was proud of myself. It didn't matter how stupid Daryl thought I was. I was doing the right thing and I knew it. If nothing came of this then fine. If Rick told the others then I would suffer through whatever punishment they saw fit. Daryl was worth that to me.

~H~

I needed to get the hell out of the prison. I needed to do anything that would keep my mind off of that idiot woman. I knew Rick was looking at me, trying to figure out what the hell was going on without asking me about it. I stopped outside the door as the others filed down the stairs and into the yard. I put my hand on Rick's shoulder before he could join them.

"She didn't do it," I said, making sure I held his eyes. "She cleaned it up but I killed them both."

He sighed and shook his head in exasperation. "I know you wanna protect her, brother. I get that. But you can't take the fall for this. It doesn't matter. I can't tell the rest of them. Tyreese..." he looked out towards the fence, "Tyreese isn't himself. He'd end up hurtin' her and even though I don't agree with what she did, she's my family. If he did somethin' to her..."

"Then he'd be the next one to die," I said without letting him finish. There was no way in hell Tyreese was layin' a finger on her. This was the kind of shit that she hadn't thought about when she opened her big stupid mouth to Rick. And she was right. I could tell by the way Rick was lookin' at me that he didn't believe a fuckin' thing I said. He thought I was coverin' for her just like she knew he would.

"Daryl, I don't know what's gotten into her but you have to talk to her. See if she really did do this because she wanted to contain the virus. There's a possibility that she's losin' it."

I felt myself scowling and couldn't do anything about it. "She ain't crazy Rick. She didn't do it."

He clapped me on the back and turned to head down the steps. "Just talk to her," He said over his shoulder.

I went back inside, no longer feeling the urge to flee. Rick was right about one thing. Tyreese was out for blood and if he thought for a second there was a chance that Carol was involved then he was just about out of his mind enough to try to hurt her. My stomach twisted at the thought.

I couldn't wrap my head around why she had done this. Why did she tell Rick that it was her? She could have just told him no. No one knew what was going to happen to the person that committed these crimes and she was throwing herself under the bus when she didn't do it.

I needed to try to talk to her. Earlier I had been too pissed off and confused to get through to her. Now I was a little bit more calm. Still confused but calm and that might make talking to her a little bit easier. I checked the room where we held our meetings, thinking that she would have still been in there. She hadn't left when the rest of us had but the room was empty.

I looked everywhere, growing panicked with each empty space that I checked. The last place I checked was the room she used to teach the kids. I couldn't help but breath out a sigh of relief when I saw her standing there. She didn't see me so I was able to gather my thoughts and try to go at this from a different angle than I had earlier.

"You alright?" I asked once I was close enough to really get a good look at how tense she was. I thought about how she had froze up at the meeting and the way her hand felt under mine. I felt a little stupid about that move but at the time all I wanted to do was make sure she knew that she wasn't alone in there. She should know by now that I wouldn't let anything happen to her.

I instantly was reminded of what she had said. She had insinuated that she didn't matter. That she didn't mean as much as I did to the rest of the group and that was bullshit. I didn't put too much focus on that or I would just get myself all pissed off again and then we would end up doing the same thing that we had done earlier.

"I'm fine," she said, turning to face me fully. Her arms crossed over her chest as she watched me. I didn't blame her. I had threw one hell of a fit earlier. Her eyes went to the hand that had smashed into the file cabinet. I did it to scare her into admitting to Rick that she wasn't the one but it hadn't worked out that way. She was a stubborn ass woman now. She reached out and lifted my hand in both of her own, frowning as she studied the knuckles that were already scabbing over. Her hand was warm and the smile that tugged at her lips was a sad one.

"That ain't nothin'," I said quickly as I pulled my hand out of hers. She let it go easily. She knew me well enough by now to know not to push her luck. It wasn't that I didn't want her because that was something that I was pretty sure everyone knew, and if they didn't know by now then they were either stupid or blind. I would go with stupid though. Hell, I had pretty much told her earlier what she meant to me. I hadn't meant too but she was being so goddamn pigheaded that I had slipped. But it was true.

"Why are you here?" She asked quickly. It caught me off guard a bit.

"We need to talk," I said, catching her arm before she made her way past me. "I told Rick that I was the one that did it."

She faced me fully and pulled her arm out of my grip. "And he believed you?" She gave me a knowing look that sent my teeth on edge.

"No."

She nodded. "Good."

I bit back a curse and took a deep breath to try to steady my nerves. It wasn't easy because she pissed me off and she knew it. She tried to pass me again and this time, like it had a mind of it's own, my arm struck out and caught her around the waist, yanking her towards me until her back slammed into my chest. "Not good," I growled into her ear. Why the hell couldn't this woman listen to reason? I almost missed the old Carol. The one that wasn't such a snarky asshole that had a stubborn streak ten miles long.

"I'm not fighting you on this anymore. It's done and for now nothing is going to happen to me so drop it. Why is it so hard for you to just let this go? Let me do this. I owe you that much."

I frowned and kept my grip despite the fact that she hadn't tried to get away from me. Talking to her would probably be easier if I didn't have to look her in the eye so I kept her where she was. "You don't owe me shit," I said, wondering why the hell she felt like she owed me anything. I hadn't done anything that any of the others wouldn't have done. Hell, I had caused her a lot more grief than anyone else around here had.

After Merle she had been the one to keep my head above water. If anything, I owed her. She didn't let me slip away and that was something I would always thank her for. Maybe not out loud but I didn't need too. She just knew it already. Or I hoped she did anyway.

"Carol..." I lost track of what the hell I was about to say when I felt her lean further into me. There wasn't much I could say either since this was kind of my idea.

"What?" She asked with quiet exasperation.

I couldn't remember what the hell I was wanting to say. All of a sudden the only thing that I could think about was the lengths that this woman would go too to protect _me_. I wasn't used to it and I had a hard time grasping it. Another thing that had me scrambling for words was the position I had inadvertently put us in. "I don't need you protectin' me, alright. I can take care of my damn self." Damn it! I had put my mouth too close to her ear and now the smell of her soap filled my nose and had my teeth clenching.

"It's what we do," her shoulders lifted in a delicate shrug, causing her bare shoulder to bump into my chin lightly.

Why wasn't I letting go of her and why wasn't she trying to get away from me? I needed to focus on what I came in here for. Then I remembered that the real reason I had gone looking for her was because I was afraid for her to be alone in case Tyreese lost it completely. I was in here to protect her. God, we were a couple of fucked up individuals.

"What did you mean when you said that earlier?" She asked suddenly, yanking me from my thoughts.

I froze. I knew what she was talking about but I didn't have any intentions to explain it to her. The truth was, everyone in our group seemed to have someone to look out for and too look out for them. Me and her had been just that for a very long time. Me and her. I looked out for her and she did the same for me as much as she could. Things had evolved into something more complicated than I had ever imagined they could. Lines blurred on a daily basis now and I was usually never sure where we stood. I held her at arms length but really it was because I was too scared to take any kind of leap. But I had meant what I had said. She had asked who was she and the answer was simple. As far as I was concerned she was everything. She was who mattered to me but I couldn't tell her any of that. I was a damn idiot for saying it earlier.

"Daryl?"

"Nothin'," I said quickly. "I was just tryin' to get you to see reason. What good it did me."

She nodded slightly and moved away from me a little. I stopped her by tightening my arm around her waist. I don't know why I did it. All I did know was that I didn't want her to move away. I was losing my mind... or maybe finally growing a pair. Either way she settled back against me. I should have let her go. I shouldn't have been putting any focus on the way her body felt pressed against mine. But I did and I couldn't help but think about other things. Things like how no one other than my brother had ever cared about what happened to me as much as she did. I kept thinking about how, even when the others in the group looked at me like I was the devil himself, she never once did. And now she would risk her own ass to save mine. I tried to stop thinking about that and after a few minutes it worked.

I felt her hand on my arm, felt her lean her back further into my chest. I could feel her heart pounding fast and hard through both of our shirts. She tilted her head slightly, baring her neck a little like I was some kind of vampire freak there to chew on her. The thought was actually causing my mouth to water a little so I swallowed loudly and decided to say something that may stop this sudden lapse of judgment. "We're losin' light."

Don't even ask why I thought it would be a good idea to whisper in her ear. I don't know the answer. I also don't know why I chose that moment to slide my other hand around to her hip. I just did. It'd been a rough day. Shitty excuse, I know. But that didn't matter at this point. What mattered was the way she chose that very moment to move her hips in such a way that caused her ass to grind up on my crotch. The floor fell out from under me at this point. An intoxicating combination of want, longing, excitement and acceptance spiked my blood and kicked my heart into overdrive. There was a hundred reasons to not let this happen. I tried to reason with myself and I thought maybe I was getting somewhere but I thought wrong because the urge to take her up on this invitation was not something I could step away from.

So with little thought about the consequences I ran my tongue up the long column of her neck like some kind of hungry dog. I could taste the saltiness of sweat and a sweet taste that was probably just her and something else that made me growl low in my throat. Yeah, just like a fucking over eager pup.

Her breath came out in a rush, the sound made me want more. It had been a long time since I had been with a woman. I lost track of the years. The kind of women that Merle brought home wasn't anything I was interested in. From a distance they looked pretty good but up close I could always see them for who they really were. Some were just flat out whores. They fucked for a living and I never found myself turned on by a woman that had probably let five or more men a day get into her. Others were just strung out and didn't care. If Merle had the drugs then they were willing to do what they needed to do to get their share. I didn't have any use for women like that after I became old enough to know exactly what they were about.

I kept my distance from Carol because I cared too much. I wasn't sure exactly how to go about being with someone that I cared about. It was too risky in my book. She had already wormed herself into my head. Hell, if I was gonna be completely honest with myself then I had to admit that it wasn't just my head she occupied. It was everything and it was a scary ass thing for a man like me. And I was probably already fuckin' up. I hadn't even kissed her. I licked her. Jesus, what an asshole. A woman like her didn't want some man lapping at her like she was somethin' to snack on.

I stood there breathing heavily into her neck, tryin' like crazy to gather my thoughts and figure out how to get myself out of this. I didn't know what the hell I was doin' and the thought of screwin' it up had me frozen in place. I was glad she couldn't see me because that would have been too much for some reason. To have to look her in the eye and know that she knew how bad I wanted her was too much to handle. And it wasn't like I could just shrug it off and act like it was some sort of mistake because the proof was pressed right up against her now.

I was close to flat out askin' her what she wanted me to do but I didn't have to humiliate myself like that. She was a new woman now and apparently that meant that she was a lot more bold than I ever gave her credit for. She covered my hand with her own, the one that was gripping her hip, and slid it around until my fingers were touching the button of her pants. Unwittingly my teeth grazed the skin at the back of her neck while I worked the button of her pants loose. Great. I licked her and now I was biting her. Way to go Daryl. She had to have thought I was some sort of freak. Maybe I was.

Once I had the zipper yanked down she grabbed my hand. "Wait..." she said quickly.

I hated to say it but I really didn't feel like waiting anymore. She was probably changing her mind, either that or I had read her all wrong and I was now making a complete ass of myself by droolin' on a woman that wasn't even interested. This was bad because there was no way I could ever look at her again if that was the case. She would think I was a fumblin' freak.

She bent at the waist, causing me to groan embarrassingly loud as my hands went straight to her hips. My head instantly went to all sorts of places all at once as more blood rushed south. She was untying her boots. I hadn't even thought of that so, gripping her hips even harder, I kicked mine off. There was a voice in my head that kept telling me to step away. This was going to complicate things and it was the last thing I needed right now with everything else that was going on.

"Stop," she said, glancing back over her shoulder. She turned around and looked me dead in the face, her eyes flashing almost angrily. I instantly dropped my hands. If she wanted me to stop then I would stop. She shook her head quickly and pressed herself against me, her hands on my chest. "I meant stop worrying," she said quickly.

"I thought..." I started but she didn't let me finish. Her arms went around my neck and I didn't hesitate at all. I finally kissed her. You know, since the licking and the biting stuff was out of the way, why not? I wasn't a huge fan of kissing women. Fucking? Sure. I could swing that. Kissing was different. Kissing, somehow, in my own head, involved a little more intimacy than I was comfortable with. There was no real reason to do it and back when I bothered with women at all, I had never been one to put very much of myself out there. Usually just the bare essentials.

This wasn't like that and I didn't even have time to ask myself why this wasn't like that. Her lips were as soft as I always imagined they would be. My head felt clouded and I had no choice but to force down another growl when my tongue swept into her mouth. I couldn't get my brain to think about anything that didn't involve her. She kissed me back like no one ever had before, like her sole purpose in life was to coax me out of my shell using nothing but her tongue and her teeth. Why the hell hadn't I been doing this for over a year now?

I had to take my hands off of her long enough to shrug out of the vest that she shoved off my shoulders. She didn't bother with the buttons on my shirt. I was surprised but didn't complain. I barely heard the sounds of buttons bouncing off the concrete floor since I was panting like an idiot. I couldn't get enough air into my lungs but I refused to stop kissing her. That was, until she boldly ran her hand over the straining bulge in my pants. I pulled my face away just enough to get a decent look at her face. Her eyes were wide and she was biting her lip. I couldn't tell if she was impressed or not and at this point I didn't really care anymore. All I knew was that she had to stop rubbing on it or I was gonna make a mess of this thing. I grabbed her wrist and shook my head slightly.

My heart was pounding so hard that the blood rushing behind my ears was drowning out all other sounds in the room. I vaguely remembered that the door was unlocked and anyone could come in at any time. So I did what I needed to do. I hooked my thumbs into the waistband of her pants and slid them down her hips. Her underwear followed suit. My mouth sought out hers again. I couldn't stop thinking about kissing her.

I didn't fight her when her hand went to undo my pants. Her other hand made it's way up my chest and then into my hair. I started backing her up. There wasn't a bed in here and the floor was concrete but there were tables. It was getting darker so all I could do was hope that if someone did walk in then they wouldn't be able to see much. The down side was the fact that I wanted to see every fucking thing and it was growing more dim by the minute.

I broke away again and yanked her shirt off, growing more impatient. Instead of meeting her lips again I was suddenly stopped. The tips of her fingers pushed my head back slightly and her eyes met mine. "You sure about this?" she asked in a rush.

I raked my gaze down and swallowed hard. There was a lot of good stuff that she was always hiding under those clothes. I slid my hand up her ribcage and let my thumb slide along the bottom swell of her breast. I couldn't exactly find my voice so I wrapped my arm around her waist and lifted her up roughly, giving her no choice but to wrap her legs around me. I nodded and then sat her down on the table that I had been aiming for to begin with.

Her legs pulled me closer and I could feel the heat coming off of her body. I forgot that I was suppose to be pissed off. I forgot that there were a lot of things that needed to be said and I forgot that she was a complete idiot who I wanted to yell at for at least another couple of hours. Nothin' like that mattered at the moment. What mattered was that her hand was snaking into my pants and the realization that I was about to actually have sex with Carol Peletier, my best friend, the first person in the whole group to give a shit about me at all, on a table had my head spinning. A table?

It could have been worse I guess. I could have just tossed her on the floor and done it there or pushed her against the wall. She didn't seem to have any reservations either because she started working my pants down my own hips. I didn't try to help her out either. My hands were busy at the moment. I damn near lost it all when she let out a low moan once my teeth made contact with the sensitive skin, I worked my way down from her throat to her chest. I made sure to use my tongue to massage away the sting from the bites. I wasn't a complete animal. Even if I did find myself growling a lot.

The table was long and we were on the edge of it. It wasn't good enough. I couldn't seem to get close enough so I started pushing her further back. She obliged and I was somehow able to climb all the way onto the table without breaking contact with her skin. I was bracing myself with one arm while my hand slid down between her legs and it was then that I almost panicked. I don't even know why, really. I guess it was because, just like the kissing, I never really bothered with much touching before. I never gave a damn whether or not they were having a good time. This was different.

She must have sensed my nervousness because I felt her hand on mine, guiding it the rest of the way. That was all the push I needed. I don't think I ever explored anything as thoroughly as I explored her and every little sound she made had me biting the inside of my jaw so I would focus on the pain and not the unforgiving ache to be inside her.

She must have had other plans, and taking this slow apparently wasn't one of them. She pulled my hand up and linked her fingers through mine as she pushed her hips up. She made a frustrated noise when I pulled back just a little but I was only trying to get my bearings. I eased down between her legs and met her eyes. I figured it was now or never and I could only hope that it didn't suck. It was kind of a pain in the ass to give a shit about things like that. It put a little more pressure on a man.

I took in a deep breath and held it and somehow she just knew what was about to happen because she brought her hips up as soon as I moved forward. I moved slow, still holding my breath. We could have gotten overrun. The building could have caught on fire. The whole miserable goddamn world could have imploded and I don't think I would have noticed a thing. The breath I was holding exploded from my lungs as soon as I moved into her. I couldn't recall anything in my life feeling as good as this did. She let out a surprised squeak and then tensed a little.

I froze, bracing myself on my elbows and met her wide blue eyes. It was dark but not so dark that I couldn't see them. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt her so I didn't move. "You okay?" the question slipped out of my mouth but I could barely recognize it as my own voice. It was heavy with lust.

She nodded and then relaxed, moving her hips experimentally, causing me to drop my head and groan loudly into her ear. She actually giggled and then did it again, winding her arms around my neck. She really was an asshole sometimes.

She relaxed a little more and out of spite I rolled my own hips, pushing myself deeper than before, biting back the urge to make any stupid noises. The heat was about to drive me insane and the way she gripped me had every nerve ending in my body tingling but I couldn't let myself go, no matter how much I wanted too. For one, it would have been embarrassing as fuck and for two, I wanted her to like it. The goal here was to make it last, to make it good and to make her want more. This sure as hell wasn't going to be the one and only time this happened.

She gasped and then whimpered, causing me to lift my head to look at her again. She looked mad that she had let it slip that she had actually enjoyed that, so I did it again. She narrowed her eyes. I bit my lip to keep from grinning. This was quickly becoming some sort of game. That was okay. I was good at games. I started moving, keeping myself in check and the pace slow and deep.

Her lips parted but she was silent. Her body on the other hand told a story of it's own. I could feel the muscles in her stomach tensing and the muscles inside tightened and released me with every thrust. This spurred me on. I kissed her quickly and then picked up the pace before my lips went to her ear.

"You gotta try a little harder than that. Your poker face is good but I got a feelin' you like this," I whispered right before I caught her earlobe between my teeth. I don't know what made me say that to her but I was glad that I did.

Her hands gripped the sides of my head and she nearly came off the table as she crushed my lips with hers. A strangled cry erupted from her and I drank it up like my life depended on it. I felt a wave of heat and then her body arched just as her muscles coiled around me, holding me in a vice like grip before pulsing around me. I think I might have cursed a bit, I don't really know because I came completely undone after all of that. I heard her say my name, felt her body humming and throbbing in time with her hammering heart, nails biting into my shoulders.

I couldn't breath, I had to yank my lips away from hers and I'm pretty sure I snarled into her neck as the first tremors hit me and then those tremors quickly turned into a full blown eruption of sensation as I poured into her. Her legs came around me as I drove into her mercilessly, unable to think about being careful with her anymore. I was unable to control the words that were slipping from my mouth, or the pathetic noises that I made. I was pretty sure I told her I loved her and I know I heard her say it back and I could only hope that she didn't think I said it just because I was in the throws of some intense, seemingly endless, orgasm. Sure, that was what loosened my tongue but it sure as fuck wasn't the reason I said it. I meant it even if it did happen to slip out right then.

I found her lips again so I could focus on kissing her as the world started to right itself once more and I slowed myself down. No need in embarrassing myself any further if it could be helped. When I stopped moving she unwound her legs from around my waist and placed her feet flat on the table.

The table. Yeah, a table. I just fucked Carol on a table. God, that was... fuck it. That was goddamn incredible. I chuckled as I moved myself down a bit so I wasn't inside of her anymore. It was still better than the floor. I wouldn't mind tryin' the wall next time though.

Her hands were threaded through my hair, raking across my scalp and I was suddenly tired. Bone weary really. There was so damn much that still needed to be said. I still thought she was a raging fucking moron. But she was _my_ raging fucking moron so I would deal with it. Whatever Rick decided to do would be okay. Nobody was gonna lay a finger on her. I meant what I said to Rick. If someone tried then they'd die. That was just the way things were now. Not just because of this either. It was because after everything she had done for all of them, for him in particular, she deserved better than being ostracized by the group. Especially when she was innocent. I wouldn't have her pay for my crimes. We'd leave if it came to that.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly.

I lifted my head, frowning. "For what?"

"For making you mad. You hurt your hand, remember?"

I opted to not say anything so I kissed her some more so she would shut up. This kissing thing was somethin' I could get used too. If I said anything then we would probably just start arguin' about it again and I wanted to at least put my damn pants back on if we were gonna have it out.

After a while I figured we had pushed our luck to the limits and I climbed off of her so I could get dressed. My damn shirt was a goner. I wasn't even sure where half the buttons had flown off too. She did the same and neither of us said a word. We didn't pass anyone on our way back to the cell block. I didn't ask any questions either. I led her to my cell, unwilling to sleep there without her. She just smiled and climbed into the bunk.

"What's gonna happen if they banish me?" She asked after I climbed in beside her.

I was silent for a few seconds but then I shrugged. "Guess Rick Grimes will have to see how well he can run this shit without me."

She was asleep shortly after that. She hadn't said anything else but I knew she was worried. She didn't have to be. We'd be alright regardless. That was the thing about me and her. We handled shit. It's what we had always had to do, even before all of this.


End file.
